Finding the Light and Movie + TV Recommendations

In My “Gratitude” Era

Hi guys!

Last month’s newsletter was a bit dark so let me hit you with some light. Or more specifically, how I find the light. The one thing I loved about starting We Win was that I was able to finally look away from my own needs and focus on someone else’s. This rehab/recovery life is a 24-7 kind of thing that can feel insanely selfish and single-minded. It’s exhausting, being reminded of all your deficits all day. But with We Win, or any kind of service, I get to forget about all of my woes and channel my energy elsewhere.

So I do see it as a luxury and even a privilege. And please, I don’t mean that in a hokey, kumbaya, corny way but I mean it matter-of-factly. My needs, woes, and wants are not as acute and all-consuming as they once were. In fact, I have a ton of things in my life to be grateful for, the main one being my social support system that can and does move mountains, and I’m well-aware that is rare. I am in a place of privilege, based solely on the fact that I have some of myself to spare and give back.

When things feel inordinately dark and my problems insurmountable, I refocus my energy outside of myself. The fact I have the freedom, safety, support and mental capacity to do that in the first place is in itself something to be grateful for. But the distance from my own world gives me perspective. (And no, I don’t use other people’s problems to feel better about my own. That kind of comparison is toxic and mean-spirited. You shouldn’t have to step on someone else’s story to stand up taller in life.)

I’ve learned that there’s always light there waiting for you, if you can get out of the shadows for long enough, if you can look away from the darkness. But that ability to look away and the reasons why you’re able to look away is where you will always find the brightest light.

Movie/TV/Book Talk

In honor of the Oscars this weekend, I wanted to include some big (and small) screen recommendations !

Movies:

Past Lives - poignant, non-traditional love story (slow but ends beautifully)

The Holdovers - endearing, curmudgeonly teacher finding his humanity

Oppenheimer - physics nerds facing intellectual challenges and moral dilemmas

TV:

One Day - beautiful rom-com that will leave you emotionally destroyed for at least a week but also great acting, innovative structure and casual south Asian representation make it incredibly binge-able ❤️‍🩹 (Netflix)

The Tourist - thriller about a John Doe in Australia, with some plot holes but with a scene-stealing actress who you can’t help but adore and an ending that was totes adorbs (Netflix)

Books:

Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner - ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ - incredible memoir that tells her story of navigating grief over her mother’s death by cooking the Korean dishes that had become such a central ingredient in their lives together. A bit slow at first but then it sucked me right in.

The Covenant of Water by Abraham Verghese - Ok, I can’t figure out how to rate this book because I found the first 3/4 of the book slow, long and painful but I found the last 1/4 absolutely beautiful and enthralling so 🤷‍♀️ it’s about several generations of a family in rural India that have a very peculiar genetic trait afflicting every male member.

Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros - ⭐️⭐️ - don’t hate me! This book is beloved on TikTok but I couldn’t get into it. It’s a romance/fantasy about a school that trains dragon riders. The fantasy world and characters felt underdeveloped to me so I had trouble connecting with it.

Society of the Snow by Pablo Vierci - ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ - Chaya’s recommendation - absolutely breathtaking but wildly unsettling true story of the sixteen young rugby players who managed to survive 72 days in the Andes Mountains after their plane crashed in 1972. I wouldn’t have been able to handle this book if I hadn’t seen the film first, and I wouldn’t have been able to handle a film like that but it captured the immense love these guys had for one another, I couldn’t help but feel for them. The book compiled stories from each of the survivors decades after the crash and demonstrated the strength of the human spirit, faith, friendship, love and family. It also probed at one of my favorite questions: Why do we choose to survive after tragedy?

Mondays Not Coming by Tiffany D. Jackson - ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ - gripping story about the disappearance of a black teenage girl and her best friend’s solitary quest to find her, despite the ambivalence of the rest of the community. The big reveal was a little clunky but the story was still super engaging from beginning to end.

Quote of the Moment

“To maintain faith in every minute, despite the blows we took, we had to become alchemists. We had to transform the tragedy into a miracle, turn the depression into hope. If I had to define what the mountain made us, I have no doubt that it turned us into alchemists.”

— Society of the Snow

That’s all for now! I have to go dissect the track list of TS’s upcoming album—The Tortured Poets Department—which is rumored to be about her most recent breakup after a six-year relationship. And the album title is mocking the name of her ex’s group chat which was called The Tortured Man Club. Petty Taylor is the best Taylor. 😝

Ok, see ya next month! ✌🏽

Yours,

Harshada