In My “IDGAF” Era
Hi guys!
So, the first time I tried to get my nails done after my stroke, a manicurist from across the crowded room yelled to my mom, “WHAT HAPPENED TO HER?” My mom tried to ignore her, so she kept asking and grew louder with each attempt. Needless to say, I did not attempt to get my nails done for a good ten years after that.
But about a month ago, Setu suggested we get our nails done before the gala. I was hesitant, but I had the perfect dress picked out with some flashy earrings and I really wanted a light gold nail to complete the fit. I thought to myself, “Why can’t I enjoy nice things too?” And everything in my life feels easier with Setu around. So we went, and it was perfectly ordinary. A manicurist, however, did come up to us and did some horribly insensitive impression of someone she knew in a wheelchair, but I just blocked her out, stared down at my sparkly nails and let Setu respond. And just like that, it was over. We seamlessly returned to our gossiping and giggling, thoroughly enjoying every minute of our glam time.
Yes, I look different. No, I will never blend in. Stares and mortifying comments come with the territory. I know this was such a little, superficial endeavor, but imagine how much more of life I would miss out on if I let the fear of humiliation prevent me from going places? The secret is to surround yourself with the best people who will always lift you up when the world is trying to pull you down. And to do only things that make you happy. Because if you are genuinely enjoying yourself and the people around you, you are untouchable.
We Win Updates
The gala was amazing. We had a packed house (185 people) which means it was a huge success and hella fun! Delicious food, flowing drinks, inspiring speeches and the best company. We raised a record of $45,000!!! I’m so excited for all the new applicants with stories of resilience that we will get to help!! Immensely grateful to all of you for making this possible 🙏🏽
Our incredible foundation video created by my talented cousin Sheetal Jaisingh Dharia:
My speech from the gala:
Speech by Lauren Van Laethem, my friend and former therapist
Beautiful photos from the gala by Ram Peddinti
My interview with Charlotte Today
Quote of the Moment
“Pride is a luxury of the strong.”
— Patrick Rothfuss
Book Talk
Last month’s reads: THREE 5-star reads!!
Babel by R.F. Kuang - ⭐️⭐️⭐️ - I finally finished! Very intriguing concept and complex themes of colonialism, but I couldn’t connect with the narrative.
Black Cake by Charmaine Wilkerson - ⭐️⭐️⭐️ - Engaging family drama about a mother who passes away and leaves behind for her two adult children a massive confession about her past.
There, There by Tommy Orange - ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ - Fascinating read that follows 12 characters from Native communities in California. I learned so much about a community and a history that I knew criminally little about. It’s a quick read and I’m starting to love this story structure—seemingly separate short stories that come together in a beautiful way at the end (Sea of Tranquility, Cloud Cuckoo Land)
Demon Copperhead by Barbara Kingsolver - ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ - Lydia’s recommendation and my favorite read of the year so far! It’s a coming of age novel about a boy growing up in an impoverished, forgotten, opioid-infused town in rural America. It’s long but so captivating because it’s written so beautifully. It also constantly probes at the question of responsibility in drug addiction: the addict or the system?
Yellowface by R.F. Kuang - ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ - I love reading because it is a practice in empathy—like putting yourself in the shoes of an addict and really understanding their perspective. But this book takes that whole premise and subverts it in such a thought-provoking way. You are supposed to hate the narrator—a white woman who steals the unpublished manuscript of her Asian friend who passes away. But you find yourself rooting for her at times only to remember, no, I actually hate her. It also brings up interesting questions about who is allowed to tell what story.
I honestly can’t believe I made it through this entire newsletter without mentioning the only thing that has been on my mind for the past two weeks: Taylor Swift ❤️ Travis Kelce. The hopeless romantic in me is devouring this content at an absolutely alarming rate. Special thanks to Vinayak and PFinn for keeping me well-satiated with heartwarming and hilarious TikToks and personal insights :) it’s always such a good feeling when someone sees something and thinks, “Oh I know who will appreciate this!” Reminds you that someone is thinking of you, even when our lives feel so separate and solitary. I try to do that for as many of you as I can!
Ok, see y’all next month! ✌🏽
Best,
Harshada
I wish i could say IDGAF about more things in my life. Will try to do so on a lot of the minor irritating things. Thanks for sharing your nail salon experiences.
Nails... check. Where to next? <3